Still feeling pretty lucky

Posted on March 10th, 2013 @ 12:22 in Uncategorized

So! Update time! My life has changed quite substantially since the last time I posted for I have finally started that fabled job that has repeatedly been mentioned on here. As I predicted in the previous entry I am doing about 30 hours (31.5 this past week, tho will be 29.5 next I think). And I know that’s still not even full time but it is a hell of a lot!!!!

It doesn’t help that it’s at Sussex Uni which is at the other bloody end of town plus to make matters worse Spike refused to start when I got back from Norway so I had to get the bus and I hate buses, they take bloody ages and they make me feel travel sick and they’re so fucking unreliable that you have to leave even earlier just in case you have to stand there for 15 minutes waiting although it’s bloody peak time and they should come every five minutes. No, all of that did not help much at all.

And on Mondays I have counselling so that ate up my evening. On Tuesday I tried Spike again cuz it was a bit warmer but he still didn’t start so I called the AA and then of course I had to ride him for 40mins (in still-pretty-cold weather) to charge the battery and then go shopping and that ate up my evening. On Wednesday I went swimming. On Thursday I did an upper body work out while making soup and wrote one e-mail. And on Friday, where I worked 3-9pm, I went for a run and wrote another e-mail. That’s pretty much it. You have time for two things max each day.

So now it’s the weekend and I have to catch up on everything I haven’t been able to do during the week and I have three articles to write and blech, it’s all pretty stressful. Luckily this 30hrs/week malarkey is only during the initial project (and I really need the money so I’ll try very hard not to reduce my hours). After that I’ll go down to 20hrs/week. Much more manageable. And hopefully I’ll have a reliable bike.

Speaking of bikes, I have twofold news. On Saturday (last week, after the Spike non-starter on the Friday) I suddenly had an insurmountable urge to possess a (functional) bicycle again. So I did a bit of online browsing and then decided to do a bit of in-shop-browsing and by the end of it I’d test-ridden and paid a deposit on one of these sexy beasts. I collected it on Thursday and used it to cycle to uni (in the rain! uphill both ways!). Around 30mins to get there, fairly easy-going until the very final unbearable hill up to the Sussex Innovation Centre. Next time I’ll get off and carry it up the stairs. Home takes 20mins, so around the same as on Spike. 🙂 And when I take off the front wheel it’s also quite easy to carry it up the stairs, where I’ll hang it off the banister so it doesn’t get rusty like poor Billy. It needs a name. Someone suggested making it female. It is a ladies bike, but it doesn’t look very feminine. 😕 Suggestions welcome. “Bike” is not a valid suggestion.

That was the first fold. The second fold is that as I went to Homebase yesterday (to buy hooks to hang bike from), I saw outside one of these (Kawasaki er6f, if you don’t wanna click the link. in green. do click tho, cuz sooo pretty). And as I stood there admiring it, the owner came out and I shared my admiration and asked him if he was happy with it (this is the bike I did my test on and I had considered getting one already) and he said he was, but ultimately he wanted to get a Triumph and I said “ooooh so you’ll be selling this one!” and it ended with me giving him my number so he can phone me when he sells it (he reckons 3-4 months from now). 😀 It’s kinda pretty perfect cuz I WANT ONE but had decided to be wise and only buy one once I have saved up money for it, but I had been getting itchy, but if I know this green beauty is in my future then hopefully I can contain the itch. Hopefully. :))

I just glanced up and saw that the title of this entry is “still feeling pretty lucky”. I chose this because I read this update about Paul Gascoigne’s ongoing struggle with alcohol… sober (again) for now, explaining his recent relapse after 17 months dry, emphasising he really needs to keep going to meetings this time, that he almost died and he had to let that inspire him… it’s really fucking tragic, there is no way of knowing if he’ll manage this time, and alcohol addiction is such an absolute bitch. Look at poor Amy Winehouse; I still mourn her sometimes. And I am so lucky that when I eventually found the way out (tho this was also not my first attempt by any means), I actually found it pretty easy, and while I would not be able to stand here and say “I will never drink again”, I am not at this point of my life the least tempted to go down that path again. I am fully aware that it is not that easy for everyone, so I feel very lucky indeed. I also very recently gave up another stupid habit (please do not out me in the comments if you know what it is, thank you) and found that equally easy, though I hadn’t expected it. So for that I am grateful too.

I am also grateful that I am still steadily losing weight and being active and my knee is actually somewhat better and my hip fairly stable and while I don’t enjoy every run and sometimes see a big fat cupcake with about 500kcal in icing alone and think how nice that would taste, I have no insane cravings, I am generally satisfied with having a small piece of chocolate here and there (tho I do drink a fruit juice almost every morning so still get quite a lot of sugar), I don’t feel hungry and I’m not finding it hard!!! I remember how whenever I was on a diet or “healthy eating phase” I’d have this constant background chatter of “when this is over…” and “I could never do this forever” and “if only I could eat that” – and then of course I’d eventually succumb and EAT ALL THE CAKES and it’d all be for naught. And this time truly feels different. Right now I could happily imagine doing this forever. I think the only problematic aspect is that the making of soups and juices and smoothies (and the constant washing up), plus the running / swimming / cycling / soon gymming is gosh darn time-consuming, so were I ever to work full time again I might relapse into the lazy life. I honestly don’t know how people with jobs and families and stuff do it. Well, maybe they don’t waste so much time online and in bed. :))

I think there was something else I wanted to say. Oh yeah, the 23andme results came while I was in Norway. There was nothing earth-shattering (and tbh I prefer not to share actual health info on here for everyone to google). A few things I need to look out for, but no scary cancers and stuff (that is, I’m typical or below average risk for all of them). And all boring European ancestry, tho that was to be expected I guess.

Right. Now I need to write my remaining two articles and then some postcards and then I might just have a few hours for random stuff before I need to go swimming! 😛


LJ said on Mar 10, 2013 at 2:07 pm

🙂 That all sounds brilliant. Indeed there is something to be said for acknowledging when things are actually going well, particularly when they’re a result of putting the hard work in yourself.

Clarissa said on Mar 10, 2013 at 3:42 pm

*nods head vigorously* If there were a like button on my blag, I’d like your comment. :))

alessandra said on Mar 13, 2013 at 2:42 pm

You are sool!

Clarissa said on Mar 13, 2013 at 8:44 pm

😮 If you read my blag I will have nothing to write about in your letter! :)) (which I have started, but don’t have much time these days unfortunately…)


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