Entry with a title
Oh how I should sleep. I am so unwise. :wh
I didn’t go to work today. It went from “hi I don’t feel right I’ll come in later” to “hi, I still don’t feel right, I MAY come in still later”… then didn’t go in at all. We’ll see what they say. :)) Other people seem to get away with it so I guess I’m testing the waters? Should be ok I think. If not I’ll blame woman problems or sth. Or stress? I am tempted to blame stress but I don’t wanna leave the impression that I crumble whenever I have 2 things (Mika & Paris?) hitting me at once. Especially cuz I am planning to go to Paris (without Mika) twice next month. 😐
Tomorrow’s a holiday in Germany, so I don’t have to work. I said I’d go in for half a day (long before I called in sick today lol) so I will have to do that. Doesn’t matter when tho I guess. Also have to get my hair cut. Etc etc. I am entirely unmotivated.
Mika still sucks btw. Well not him but stupid wifey, she replied to me (email) and was a right bitch, so I will complain to the record company. And if they are bitches too and try to fob me off I will be very immature and do an entry entitled “Mika Person is very unprofessional” (replacing “Mika Person” with wifey’s real name of course). Because I can, and now that I am back on Google I may as well use my power. Cuz I’ve googled her and there are not very many results, so if I do that my entry should be result #3 within a few days. :)) And my domain is still not registered to me. :)) :wh But yeah that’s a last resort of course. First I’ll call Universal. 😀
Oh yeah, RUTH was released today… you know, the Placebo video. I’m not in it. Am not terribly disappointed tho – I do like the video. And I love Placebo. Brian is hot. And has never disappointed me. Unlike Mika. 😐
OH! BUT! You know I mentioned other Mika competition winners and how they were cute etc. They added me on Myspace (I tried to find them last night but couldn’t) and they are really rather cute and pretty. 😀 At least something good came of it all. So let me introduce Caroline and Charlie. 😀 :wh Another winner was Sara and I added her too! 😀
So ja, met loads of nice people at least. 😀 And am again way ahead of Jimmy. Not that we actually have a competition going anymore, since I was all grown up and stepped back and stuff. And am totally over the whole thing. Except for the tiny fact that he added my Wolferl. How desperate can you get?! X( 😐 So although I am still not competing with him anymore, I am acutely aware of what lengths he went to. And I shall not forget it. And I am 21 friends ahead of him as we speak. :)) Not that there is a competition anymore. At all. 😐
Oh yes may I say sth about Maddie? Even tho it is so very unlike me. Well actually I guess what I want to say is still very me in a way. I’ve been semi-following the story as it evolved, it’s just yet another one of those “disappeared kids” stories. Which you kinda become immune to almost the same way as with Iraq suicide bombing stories. 😐
And I was doing a pretty good job at being distant and unbothered until I saw cute pic of kid. Little girl who is most certainly dead by now, and you sorta hope she is cuz if she’s not it’s even scarier to think of. 😐 And being those parents must be the absolutely worst thing to go through, ever. Like, it must suck and hurt and be awful and scary and incredibly painful and entirely unbearable and then some. To a degree of awfulness I can’t even begin to imagine. 😐
So yeah – yet another reason not to have kids. It must sound deranged to cite those very unlikely risks as an anti-breeder argument (and I guess it really isn’t one to people who want kids) – but oh my God. Even the remotest chance of sth like that happening is 1000 times enough to scare me off. And I’m actually very impressed with my mum for choosing to have me in the light of such frightening possibilities. (and I know she is much like me in that respect – she was convinced she wouldn’t manage to raise me to the age of 18).
Ja. I should sleep now.
Oh man, Clarissa’s revenge will be terrible – you better not mess withher :p
It’s at least good to see you can like kids that much, that you do not want to have children, because someone could hurt them like that.
I follow the Maddie story a bit. I still believe they can find her and are probably even close to finding her.
Yeah, the Madeleine thing is awful, and v scary, and they have NO idea which is astonishing in this day and age. Is Charlie still with you?
How come called in sick tho, like just coz not been going to bed?
You think? @ stagiaire. I admit I tend to be overly pessimistic… but kids are very rarely found alive in such situations. And ja I don’t… hate kids to such a degree that I want them to suffer. I just can’t stand having them around me.
BML, Charlie never was with me, I dunno why you thought he was. 😕 He’s in NC. He will be with me in 2 weeks tho 😀 😡
Called in sick cuz felt like it. You know I have a poor work ethic. :))
Hi, I’m bored.
Shall I not go to ballet class tonight and go home and sleep? I should really go to the gym as I feel fat. I’m only asking because I’m bored & tired of work. Once I leave the (h)office, I’ll feel better.
I somehow still have hope. I don’t feel like she’s dead already. She feels alive to me, but I may be wrong. But sometimes I feel it in my guts when there’s no hope anymore. I fear they really sold her for child prostitution. The parents also look as if they feel she’s still alive. I think a parent feels best what s/he has to expect.
BTW in case you plan on updating WP to 2.2 I just did and it worked very smoothly. Just do not delete the config-file and delete the rest except for themes and plugins. Then it should work well.
But parents always hope that the kid is alive. 😐
Oh @ upgrading… AGAIN? I just upgraded 2 weeks ago or sth. 😐
Hm yeah my Fantastico isn’t offering to upgrade yet so will wait until I can do it through there anyway. 😛
Hi Mel btw :)) I guess I’m too late for advice now. 😛
Parents always EXPRESS hope, but there’s a difference between what you feel and what you say. And I think those who in reality feel their hope is useless, e.g. cry a lot more.
But Maddie’s parents do not cry, when talking about their daughter, they seem rather strong and probably angry on the outside.
Of course, you could say, some cry and some just don’t. Or they try to hide their feelings, that’s why you don’t see them crying. But I believe, you can’t hide your inner feelings if you truly believe your child could be dead. I know I couldn’t. I’d be totally devasted and cry with every word I speak.
This morning I also heard on the news the parents believed she was still alive, and the police did so also, because someone had informed them that she was seen in Lissabon. They probably find the information very reliable. And I could imagine that they went to Lissabon with her, because that’s the city in Portugal from which you can leave the country best and fastest.
My guess is that a lot of what they say on TV is rehearsed and not necessarily their true feelings.
Anyway. We shall see. 😛
I have hope and believe I will not be disappointed. 😀
Though then again I’m not sure whether it’s right to focus on the girl and forget about all the other children that have been missing for many years already. It’s just a fashion with Maddie now, but who cares about the others?
Yeah that’s true. But that’s how the whole thing works. 😐