Reminiscing and procrastinating

Ja so instead of working on my dissertation I have been going through old entries... from last December to be precise (not sure how I ended up there) and it's weird and sad to read those again. It seems to me now that last December was a fab time. There was that weekend in Brighton when we found our flat, we had so much fun doing immature stuff with Daniel and being generally stupid, and there was lots of travelling around, to Bern and stuff, and I am probably idealising stuff now but it seemed I was a lot more carefree and positive back then. Everything was still ahead of me. And things were easier somehow, there were less complications between 'some people', everything was just more fun and less tiring. But as I said, maybe I am just idealising.

Ja and then there's the problem of my job (slight change of topic here). I've kind of decided to quit before squiZZ gets here and take July off to do exciting stuff. Cuz I can't get any days off and arranging shift swaps is a fucking nightmare, so the whole Placebo thing becomes a bit of a problem (I need Saturday off to go to France, and working other days and leaving squiZZ on his own ain't fun either), plus Craig will be visiting the weekend after squiZZ leaves and I would be working 2 out of 3 days that he's here. Plus I was originally gonna go see Mon at the end of the month, then found out I couldn't cuz of the bloody job, but I really wanna so if I quit I could do that too. And spend the rest of the month on the bloody dissertation (yawn).

I have to get a full time job anyway to pay the bills (as rent is no longer paid for) so might as well do this... right? But it's scary of course, this job is safe and good and once I quit it will be gone forever, I doubt they'll hire me again so soon. And if I can't find a "proper" job right away I might have to settle for something much more crap than checkouts, and with far worse pay too, and  I'd have to do it full time... but I really want July off, and I really wanna see MonMon again, and I am basically deciding between being irresponsible but having fun, and being grown up but ruining much of my summer. What a dilemma. I also need to go to Riga. Won't manage that in July anyway tho. (and @ fares! £87 one way! )

Tralalala.... Hang on to your IQ... now back to that dissertation.