I shall update you about my life. I actually feel ok tonight, a bit hyper and not motivated enough to do what I should be doing, but generally ok.
So I was saying... oh no hang on, I wasn't saying anything. But I am about to say... stuff.
Like this:
J and I went to see Robbie at Milton Keynes. You know, this guy. I was not excited enough, apparently. You see, the whole thing was decided / planned ages ago (like last November or sth). In the meantime I guess I got less excited about RW. J wasn't too happy about that. I whinged a lot throughout the day. But she said I wasn't so bad. And I had a great time with her (I'd never really spent any time with her on my own before you see). So that was good. 
She's very cute and her boobies are still very much mine!!
When I got back from that I had two invitations for interviews. This was unexpected and nice. I hadn't hoped for interviews on either of those jobs. One was today; it went ok, not that well. One is tomorrow, and I ain't done anything to prepare... but oh well. I think I don't wanna talk about it? 
I guess I prefer to dwell on how I will fail.
I've spoken to my mum a few times... turns out my nan has decided not to evict my father after all. She can't face dealing with it apparently. Not that I blame her, but ugh. Apparently now I'm supposed to gently suggest to her that she leave me sth else in her will... because my mum never got alimony for me you see, and my nan's excuse for that was always "but she'll inherit the flat" - heh. The whole situation's kinda awkward.
Oh and I've booked a flight and hotel for the Placebo concert in Paris on 2nd Oct. Originally I was gonna go with squiZZ, and I was looking forward to it and really excited and all. But he ended up treating me like a commodity yet again - and this time I decided I'd had enough. And since telling him how much it upsets me when he acts like a selfish prick (which I have tried repeatedly) clearly has no effect (because - I guess - he has learnt that he can get away with it?), I decided to be selfish and horrible to him too, and basically make him regret what he did.
And I am in the fortunate position to have things that he wants, and to not want anything that he has (apart from Rainbow). Perhaps I should feel guilty, but the hell I will. So I'm going to Paris on my own, and to the Placebo concert on my own (and I have both tickets and he ain't getting the 2nd one). And he has booked (and paid for) eurostar & hotel on our trip, and I have not yet paid him back, and have no intention of doing so now. Heh. And oooh, I have the tickets for the London concert in December too! Anyone wanna come along to that one?
I was actually kinda surprised how much support I got when I decided to be evil to him. I'd almost feel bad about being such a vindictive bitch... if I wasn't so hurt and disillusioned. And if I hadn't given him sooo many damn chances, and repeatedly got disappointed. 
Heh.